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But I must have been receiving some flirtatious signals because a few weeks later, when I had a work appointment in London and was invited to stay overnight in a hotel, I gave Steve a call. I categorically believed that I was incapable of making love to anyone other than Simon.As I picked up the telephone I was so nervous I could hardly speak. I could not imagine touching, let alone sleeping, with anybody else.We went on to have a daughter, Hero, seven, and a son, Tybalt, six, and bought a disused church in Snowdonia. The problems came when I discovered Simon's drug habit, then his affair.Simon and the au pair left together that same evening.Of course, in the immediate aftermath of our split, friends rallied round, cooking me meals or visiting with a bottle of wine and a box of hankies.They tried to keep me and the children as busy as possible.Simon was an armed robber serving nine years who'd grown up on a council estate.But in the confines of the prison walls, our very different upbringings didn't matter.
All I could see before me was loneliness and an eternity on the shelf. Over the next two years, I went out with four gorgeous, interesting and extremely different men.
I'd been in relationships almost continuously from my 20s and had lost any ability to be on my own.